Don't you just hate the feeling when you get disappointed at yourself or someone else?
You know that shitty feeling and it's so shitty you know, just so shitty.
whether is it a test you prepared for a long period, a performance you practiced so hard, maybe even disappointing someone who had a little expectation from you.
And you wish you could be given a second chance but then it's impossible.
Recently, don't ask why but due to a certain issue, i just felt so disappointed in myself.
It wasn't the results that disappointed me, it was that i didn't take the full use of the chance i was given in the beginning despite knowing what the outcomes would be.
And it's so saddening cause there's no turning back.
Although i know i could have done a better job than before,
it's over.
And i start to blame myself and get all sad.
Then maybe after awhile i decide to pull myself together and do my best with what i got
but everytime i turn around, i see my mistake is still following me
and i get so frustrated, confused and angry at myself.
But it's already too late.
Yes that feeling.
It's so crappy and sad
and it's worst when you disappoint someone.
you get scared that they'll give up on you and all.
and it's like you couldn't even accomplish a little of their expectation from you.
sigh.
And i guess everyone deserves a second chance but not everyone is given a second chance.
This is prolly the worst feeling in the world.
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